A Funky Mood

I'm in a funk right now and I'm not sure why. I'm not very motivated to do anything and that's not good. I need to clean my house, really clean it, and I come home and sit on my butt. I need to get some motivation, some energy. I don't know why I don't have any.

I think part of it is I'm now getting lonely. I miss having someone to talk to or do things with. There is MB#2, but I don't want to lead him on since I don't want to date him anymore. He's fun to hang out with, but I don't want anything more. And he knows that for now. But once his divorce is final, I think he'll try harder. And it'll be hard to let him down. But I've seen how he is with his ex, and I don't want to deal with that. But I do want to meet someone new; someone who doesn't have the drama in them. It would be nice to be in a drama-free relationship.

Plus, I'm still in love with Atlanta boy. I know I shouldn't be, and the relationship will never work. But I can't help it. Whenever I talk to him, everything just comes back. And I need to get over it. He's there and I'm here, and that'll never change. And you would think that after all this time, I'd be over it. He definitely knows the right buttons to push. He calls me for the most stupid reasons, but half the time he won't return my calls. It's his way of controling this relationship. Ugh!

And this stupid "fight" with the singles, well, it's just annoying. The funny thing is that I don't really miss Kim or Eric. It's comical that they go out of their way not to say anything to me. Kim sent a picture out to everyone but me - Jayne forwarded it to me and thought that Kim was being too petty about everything. But I'm fine with it. It's almost a relief not to be dealing with all of that hassle. But I do miss Bill. And it's stupid of him to not be talking to me. This conversation had nothing to do with him. But if he feels like he has to choose sides, well, I can't do anything about that. I don't plan on seeing him until the FSU game, since Eric won't hang around us for the Georgia Tech game, and I don't know if he's coming to the BC game. So in a way I'll be glad when football season is done with this year. Too much drama still going on.

And we did win the football game!! We came out fighting and we so did it!! Well, our defense and special teams did it. Our O line wasn't quite there yet. But they're getting there. Next week is Duke, then a week off. So hopefully that'll help get them back on track. #12 baby - gotta love it!